I have known this guy since we were babies and we recently started talking again and we like eachother. He's currently in the Navy and is going to be for the next 5 years. I don't know if I can handle being in a long distance relationship for that long, but I really like him. Any tips or advice?
Suggestion:
Yes, just one.
If you can't handle a long distance relationship with someone who works crazy hours, sometimes has to pull 24 hour duty, has to work closely with other women, won't be able to talk sometimes ffor days on end…Don't date him.
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
Well…. I dont know much about what the navy is like etc because my husband is in the army. We are currently going through a deployment right now. He will be gone for 10 months in afghanistan, its been about three months now and its very VERY hard. Im not going to lie .. i f***ing hate it. BUT you gotta do what you gotta do.. thats all I really can say. You are only dating so it will at least test your strength and if its not meant to be its not meant to be! But you can do it if you really need to….
All I can suggest is just enjoy the time you have together ALWAYS because being in the military its inevitable that there will be longs stretches of loneliness <3
Goodluck! If you ever need anything feel free to email me.
I say no to five years long distance. It's stressful, hard, and it's sad not seeing them often.
But, why not move in with him? I honestly don't know how Navy works but can you live with him in his quarters?
Hello Vivienne,
At least you have known this man for a long time. You should have mentioned how old he and you are. And, how is the "knowing" between you both? Did you ever date? Did you play together as kids? Are you just saying that you know him from school? We all know many people "from school" but that doesn't make us in a relationship.
Are you interested in marrying him?
Has he shown that kind of marrying interest to you?
What are his plans to remain or leave the Navy? He must have enlisted for 6 years if he is now IN (finished training) and has 5 years left. Is he a submariner where he has to be in for 6 years because his technical school was over 1 year long?
In the Navy a sailor can expect to be gone 50% of his time to sea. Long distant relationships are very volatile and risky.
What do YOU do? Do you go to school? Are you out of school? Are you in college? Do you work? What kind of job do you do? Have you actually dated other men before? What is YOUR status. What do YOU expect out of adult life?
If you are going to college your college studies will be very different from his military service. You most likely want to pursue a career if you attain a degree. You might work anywhere in the country. His Navy bases are all on the East and West Coast/Japan/Hawaii and in the European waters and the waters near the Middle East. Just look at a map or globe and you will see where he will be on ship. If he is in a submarine he can be "anywhere" under any ocean or sea. You will NEVER know.
Now, tell me more about you and him and I can evaluate the situation for and with you.
Anchors Aweigh,
Larry Smith
Senior Master Sergeant, USAF (Ret.)
First Sergeant
Long distance relationships are tough ones. And 5 years is a long time to devote to a guy you only see when he is on leave in your area. Think about it. At the very least I would not rule out dating other guys while he is not in town.
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