I Need Some Serious Dating Advice!?

I'm hopeless with women! I have zero chat up ability. When i pay a compliment it either comes out he wrong way or sounds creepy. I was brought up in care and children's homes moving from one place to the next. This has left me with a serious fear of rejection. Saying that I have tried and tried to find a new girlfriend after a split from my last one over 5 years ago. I have joined every dating website there is. Been to speed dating events, sent a bunch of roses to a women and didn't even get a response. You might say i'm trying too hard which is probably true because no-one wants to be on their own for this long. I have paid females subtle compliments, offered to take them for dinner. When i go out to a club i just drink far too much to get a bit of dutch courage but always say the wrong thing. I'm shy but a nice guy. I don't treat women like dirt like some do. I guess nice guys finish last. Any advice would be appreciated.

I have the impression that you might be presenting yourself the exact opposite of how you mean to.
And I bet the reason this is, is because you're not confident in your approach. Even the best of approaches, when delivered with a lack of confidance, can come across as creepy or – more than likely, insincere. Girls have a great sense for knowing when someone isn't being 100% themself. Don't be so caught up about saying the right thing – it's a cliche, but just be who you are. Don't pay compliments all the time, but only when you genuinely mean it. This makes them more valuable. When you sent the roses, did you know her well? Had you established any kind of friendship or flirtation? If not, then it wouldn't generally be well-received. There's a fine line between romance and stalking – the key is recognising whether or not you have reached the stage where it would be considered romantic.
You are possibly right when you say that you're trying too hard. But it may also be a case of trying in all the wrong ways. I would never condemn internet dating sites, but I wouldn't advise you to rely on this method solely. Use it as a back-up by all means – after all you never know, and putting yourself out there might just pay off. But don't become fixated with finding someone over the net. It can be easier to project confidance from behind a screen, but you would be better off to work on real confidance, and develop your chat-up skills in person. It can seem daunting, which is obviously why you drink – again, you could be shooting yourself in the foot here. Alcohol can give you a false sense of confidance – meaning, you might think that you're being the funniest guy in the world, but actually, you're coming across as a total prat You may be saying the wrong thing BECAUSE you're drunk. In your head, you may feel that the drink is helping you – in reality, it's probably doing the opposite. One or two might help you get started, but don't rely on too much drink to get you talking. It will have the adverse effect, and, as you've noticed – girls won't respond to it.
If you have a mate who's always great with the ladies, then watch him next time you're out. Mirror his body language, note the things he says and does. One tip I heard is to practise flirting with someone you aren't attracted to. This way there's no distraction, no worry of hurt feelings or rejection, and you can gain some knowledge of what works and what doesn't. When my boyfriend was single, he said he used to be the same as you. Since he's been with me, he says that now when he finds himself in female company, he isn't trying to impress them – therefore there's no pressure and he can talk to them normally like he would talk to anyone else. (And his normal way is to crack jokes and introduce himself as an idiot). Ironically, he's since found this approach to be much more successful than when he was actually trying! So I guess the key is not to have any expections. Talk to someone for the sake of talking to them – don't always assume something to come out of it. If you can be yourself, and make girls laugh, you will have a much better shot than if you're constantly trying to be someone you're not.