Does it seem like 5 minutes ago that your child was a baby? Of course they cried – sometimes alot – but there was no doubt as to who was the boss: you.
If you feel like you are living with a toddler with all the ambition of Bill Gates and the social skills of the average tornado, this article will help you.
Issues of this type are not insurmountable – read on for some down-to-earthtips.
Why Do Problems Arise?
Don’t assume that, just because toddlers can walk – and later on talk – that their understanding of other children
and people is advancing at the same pace. Not so.
Children of this age are naturally the centre of their own universe. There is no point pushing them to understand how you or anyone else feels. They are inacapable of empathy
Research has shown that youngsters under the age of 2 don’t mean to be intentionally naughty. Concepts such as right and wrong are completely alien to them.
Even in older toddlers, many apparently naughty behaviors can often be put down to frustration, illness etc.
Biting and other aggressive behavior is an example of bad toddler behavior that is not usually malicious. Never premeditated, it can be thought of as a spur of the moment expression of frustration. As adults, we have all made thoughtless comments that we instantly regretted. And this brings us to a very important point…
Many difficult incidents can be traced back to toddlers’ limited language. Imagine how difficult life must be when you can’t express yourself properly – no wonder they get so tired and frustrated.
How To Overcome Toddler Problems
Say what you want – this is very important. Along with limited verbal expression is limited understanding. For example, telling a toddler ‘Don’t eat that pebble’ is unhelpful because they could well only grasp that you want him to eat the pebble (‘don’t’ being more abstract).
It is much better to say ‘Put the pebble down’, perhaps showing him how to do it.
Divert and distract – toddlersare so easily distracted that you can turn it to your advantage. It is a wonder to watch a tantrum change into a fit of giggles within 30 seconds of your best puppy dog impression.
Strategic ignoring is one of the most proven strategies in the fight against toddler behavior problems. This is because young children want your attention more than anything else. Responding to a screaming fit with a stony stare out of the window or time out is more effective than you might think.
Avoid shouting and name calling.Above all, never use physical punishment, such as spanking. All of these teach your toddler nothing about controlling their behavior. Physical punishment will only teach that hitting is the way to resolve your child’s problems.
For lots more information on toddler behavior, go to behavior tips for young children.
Read how to be a good parent.
You must log in to post a comment.